People think that they are witty and funny to wear them. But you are actually just showing off someone else’s talent. If quotes had patents, a lot of people would have been sued under copy right law. I’d be one of them. In my collage days. I bought a tee that had ‘I’m what I am’ on it. It cost me around 1000 bucks. 1/3 rd of my monthly allowance. Later with the maturity that comes with age, I realised I was dumber than dumb & dumber to wear it. Even now I have a couple of tees with stuff written on it. But I don’t wear them out. They are my sleep wear and I don’t mind what’s written on my sleep wear as long as It fits my budget. Coming back to t-shirts with quotes on them, I don’t mind them, I just laugh at you inside just like I laugh at my old self. But girls wearing such t-shirts put me in awkward situations. Unfortunately my education and general reading habits result in me trying to read anything I see and if its on a girl’s tee, it puts me in a very awkward situation as they think I’m starting at something else. So a Small suggestion to girls, if you wish to wear something with stuff written on it, please make sure it’s on the back.

Then comes my favourite reading material. Vehicles. People get a great variety of stuff written on their vehicles. I’d actually need a separate post to aptly describe my feeling towards these writings. They give something to think about it traffic. I’ll try to keep it short and just continue in this post .

The names of on the car. Are they his/her children? Or siblings? or just a couple of names he likes? I he a sadist to give his children such awful names? What if somebody reads these names, follows him home, sees his child playing outside, approaches them, calls out their name and tells them that he is their dad’s friend and nabs them? A lot of if’s but its a possibility. You can get anyone’s attention by calling out their name. I’m sounding paranoid but so many vehicles with names written on them and so much of time in traffic can give rise to a lot of thoughts.

Some people also try to tell me who they generally vote for. Some times just hailing a political party and some times they even mention their caste with the photo of a politician who belongs to their community. Some people just write the name of their caste as if its a badge of honour. I feel like running them over with a war rig from that Mad Max movie. Now I sound like a psychopath but if I feel that these people do not deserve to live in a sane society. These people pride themselves in being born to a couple who belong to a particular caste( a result of poor social practices and a genetic accident). These would have made sense in olden days when Caste told a person’s profession. Like a doctor mentioning his profession on an Aeroplane just in case there is an emergency and someone needs them.

I try to maintain some distance to these vehicles. Its always better to stay away from mad people.

Some people tell me their religious preferences. Some through photographs of their gods, others trough writings from their sacred books. I have 6 words for these people. Keep thy religion to thy self. The rear windshield is for visibility, not to make it a holocaust memorial or the Berlin wall. Some automobile owners tell me that their parents love them, through their vehicles. What else does ‘Maa Baap Ki Dua’ behind a vehicle mean? 

Some people advertise the financial source of the purchase of the vehicle. I’m not talking about the ‘Financed by State Bank of India’ on a Cab. I’m talking about the Mom’s gifts and Dad’s gifts. You are a spoilt brat,  good that you know it but why tell me? Unless your sponsor is generous enough to buy me a vehicle too, why would I care?

Some people tell me their profession. Especially lawyers, judges, politicians and doctors. I wonder if there is an accident, I can stop one of the cars with lawyer symbol and one with doctor symbol on it and ask the former to take legal action and the latter to perform first aid. Then there is also a next level. If one person in a family is a cop, then his entire extended family have ‘Police’ written on their vehicle. What purpose does it serve? Its still a mystery to me.

Some people tell me that they are car enthusiasts. This is done by buying a sticker from Team-BHP – a popular gearhead website. But ironically I find each and everyone to be very bad at driving. Apparently, just like quotes on your clothing –  a sticker on your car doesn’t change what you actually are. 

The other type of car entusiast takes a different route. Have you ever seen a rally/race car?  If you haven’t, this is what it looks like..

All the stuff that is written on it is for advertising the sponsors or the company parts that are installed on it. But some people for no reason get these company names written on their normal.. any thing but sports cars. They should be sued for false advertising. Some people go extra length and put expensive car logos on their cheap cars. I never tried is, but may be putting an Audi logo on their Maruthi car does increase their engine output. Don’t believe me? I too did not believe my eyes when I first saw it.

Lastly as if it wasn’t enough to write in all these places. So people get stuff written on them. Its called a tattoo or getting inked if you want to be more funky about it. They write all kinds of things mentioned above. Their loved ones names, religious stuff, funny stuff. You name it and they have it. 

So, these are some unusual places where I find interesting reading material. Well its not that interesting. I use my imagination to make it interesting. If you write something on you or your clothing or your vehicle, I’m going to judge you. Judge your intellect, judge your IQ and judge your decision making skills.